Don’t Be a “Side Chick”

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Yes, you read the title correctly.

Your questions will be answered.

Who admits they’re the side chick? Well now a days… EVERYONE. However, I want to take a different approach to the side chick. Imagine, a side chick being something that isn’t actually taboo. I mean, we all know the standard or, should I say, assumed, definition of a side chick.

The “other” woman

The second option

The one you go to when the “main” isn’t “on their job”

You get the point.

I’m sure there are thousands of different ways to “define” what a side chick means to us, but I’m going to pick a less popular definition.

Imagine this. WE [ I mean each and every person] are the side chicks to our lives. To ourselves. To our significant others.

Don’t get me wrong, there are times when we may find ourselves in situations that we can voluntarily and KNOWINGLY walk away from. But being a side chick to your own life though?! Can’t just walk away.

MY “ah-ha” moment came from scrolling through Instagram.

I was witnessing friends; acquaintances; celebrities; role models; etc. living their lives and I felt that emerald eyed friend start tapping on my shoulder. “Man, wish I could do that.” “Wish I had a man like..” “I wish; I wish; I wish.”

That’s when it hit me. Everything I “wished” for I can have. Well, as soon as I start putting myself first.

I’ve mentioned before how we, mostly women, tend to take on the world. What I failed to realize is that by us taking on the world and it’s problems, we put ourselves in the backseat of our own lives.

As mothers, our kids come before anything. Their clothes, food, daycare, etc is taken care of before we begin to even think about taking care of ourselves. There’s nothing wrong with giving your kids everything, however, there should be a balance. We give so much to our children that we tend to forget we are of no use to them if we aren’t taking care of ourselves.

When in relationships, our significant other comes before us as well. We’ve all done it, lost ourselves in our partner, given our all to that relationship. Often times, we tend to accept things that don’t feel right out of fear. We more afraid of losing them than standing up for what we deserve. We put our needs on the back burner. We sidelines ourselves.

More often than not, we’re quick to judge someone for being the “side chick” yet, we fail to realize how easily we can fall into that same category. Not condoning infidelity, but what’s worse? Personally, I felt worse when I realized I put myself on the sideline.

It’s time we stopped putting ourselves on the back burner. Our wants, desires, needs are just as important as those of everyone we take care of. Don’t feel selfish when it’s time to put yourself first.

It’s time to stop being the side chick!!

– Danielle Moses

@TheWizePig