It’s not news that Oprah Winfrey has had a special relationship with Stedman Graham for many years. She has managed to keep her relationship with him relatively out of the spotlight, strong and long lasting. Years ago, when Winfrey was at the peak of her game with the number one talk show in the nation, she was often questioned about having children and the possibility of marriage; neither of which ever transpired. We previous cover the story on Oprah with ‘People’ magazine when Stedman revealed his secrets to how his relationship with Oprah works .
“He and I agreed that had we tied the marital knot we would not still be together,” she says. In a recent article of ‘O’ magazine just ahead of Valentine’s Day, Oprah shared how her point of view on love and relationships was shaped early on when one year, her then boyfriend gave her nothing. Upset about the lack of a loving gesture, she complained to other girls who all had gifts. One of them told her, “Girl, if your man has put a flower, you won’t need no flowers in a vase!” In 1986 when Oprah first knew of Stedman, she had seen him with a girlfriend. Later, after they had broken up, she began a friendship with him but proceeded with caution initially. He proposed in 1993 and she although she said yes, she immediately had doubts. “I realized I didn’t actually want a marriage. I wanted to be asked. I want to know he felt I was worthy of being his missus, but I didn’t want the sacrifices, the compromises, a day in day out commitment required to make a marriage work. My life with the show was my priority, and we both knew it.”
Oprah went on to say that she knew that they would have had different ideas about what marriage meant to them individually. She offered that what has made their relationship thrive is that “we share all the values that matter (integrity being number one). And because we relish seeing the other fulfill and manifest their destiny and purpose.” She described their relationship as a spiritual partnership, one in which the goal for both parties is spiritual growth.
Steadman, who is a lecturer and educator on Identity Leadership mirrored Oprah’s ideas on the matter in an interview on The Ellen DeGeneres show. “The thing about our relationship is. I want the best for her so I’m dedicated to her happiness. I want her to be the best she can possibly be. I’ve been able to find my own happiness, my own skills, my own talents, my own abilities and I’m satisfied with that.” Oprah expressed that the spiritual growth relationship that they share is the ultimate flower on her mind.